My Journey on Blogging

I woke up and saw the notification saying ‘Happy Anniversary with 1 year blogging!’ by wordpress. I just thought, ‘its been already 1 year. ‘.

I started to Periscope almost 1 year ago, (Precisely 1 year and a few months ago). I was in a pretty much dark moments in my life. – I was heartbroken, staying at home depressed, not being able to go out as I suffered from pretty bad anxiety.  But there has been always one thing I liked. -Speaking to people from different countries.

Living in the countryside where no one outside of Japan knows the name of my city, it has been hard for me to meet foreign people, less alone I was stuck on my home, unable to travel. That was when I found Periscope. I just came on there to talk to people. I just wanted to distract myself from feeling alone. No one expected this to have a huge impact on my life at that moment. I still remember, when I showed the shrine for the first time, I felt something that made me think that I wanted to show the part of Japan more. – that is when I found my passion. When I could not explain about my country, I got frustrated. I started to learn about Japan, Japanese culture really hard so that I could answer to the questions that i got asked as much as I could. It had been pure joy when I realized even me, like myself could help people to know something, entertain someone in the other part of the world.

It didn’t take so long until my audience got large. I started to feel pressured as a person having a lot of followers watching me. (I currently have 15k followers). I chased something so entertaining to watch rather than enjoying myself. I unconsciously chased numbers (as hypocritical as it sounds). I even thought about the online business, but on the other hand I got stressed out. Soon after, I even started to feel alone even more, even though I have always had a great amount of people to talk to online. ‘What if the Internet shut down?’. I missed having people around me just hugging me in person. There was a day when the tears came out while I was talking to one of my friends offline. People could say, being popular will be a nice feeling, but at the end of the day you only want some people who really care about you.

My journey goes on. I decided to leave Periscope, it is not only because I got a kind of tired of being online, but also because of many reasons. I often got asked by viewers if I made money out of this activity. I did NOT. I have never been paid by any of companies. I did NOT get anything except for the donations from a few people that I love, but let me say it was not much compared to what I spent on Periscope so far. I was really passionate. I was so willing to share my culture with people, which has never changed. But the return out of it was too less. Even if I get a lot of people supporting me, I have to keep surviving. Fortunately I am lucky enough not to have to starve, have a house to live in every day at this moment.  But now that I also got to the moment where I have to think about my future it made me question. It is certainly not easy to let my viewers go, but I cannot volunteer forever for the sake of people as harsh as it sounds.  – I lost my goal. —– ‘Periscope doesn’t take me anywhere.’

It is time for a change. Periscope helped me a lot with my depression and anxiety, which encouraged me A LOT to go out and do something. As time went on I got better enough to travel alone to Italy by myself. Then, I started to think that I want to challenge myself. back then, I was so depressed i was in despair not being able to do something that I love. What I love, is still —– Speaking to people from different countries.

I am making a big change in my life. I am planning to leave my country for a while to see other part of the world, to figure out my future career more. I would like to see the world not via the Internet but through my eyes. I am sure the path I am trying to choose is not an easy way, there for sure will be difficulties that I have to go through. But I will do it anyway. —-Off topic, but there is a saying. 「案ずるより産むが易し」 (Anzuruyori Umuga Yasushi) which means, ‘making a move is easier than worrying’. ‘Umu’ means giving a birth. Originally this saying came from the woman worrying about giving a birth but actually when that time comes she finds it easier than she thought.

I wish you all the best, for whatever you do. Remember, you can do anything as long as you believe in yourself.

🙂

If you keep supporting me, I can see you on Instagram or Facebook where I post photos and a little bit of Japanese info almost every day. Check out the link below.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Advertisements

18 thoughts on “My Journey on Blogging

  1. Beautiful Saki-chan, I’m so happy you fought depression… and told it where to go.. and anxiety I know I used to break out in sweats everytime I was in a slightly formal situation

    So I am glad you got through them unscathed

    Thanks for sharing your story it was beautiful 😢😢

    Thanks

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Mark, good to hear from you! Thanks – I know! Everyone who has been thorough should be respected, because it is definitely not hard. not a nice feeling indeed. I am proud of you fighting with that. I am glad you loved it! 🙂 take care, hope to hear from you soon x – Saki

      Like

      1. Thanks Saki, I agree they should be respected, also I sent you an email to the reply I got from you—>Go check it out, if you want anything expanding on please do ask

        Like

  2. Good luck with everything Saki, you know I fully support you! ❤❤
    You did great and the principle of that proverb is something to follow for sure. I will write it down and I will try to apply it in my own life.

    I’m not on Fb anymore, but I will follow you on Instagram as always!

    *hugs*❤💕

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ciao Sara you know what! I LOVE YOU 🙂 ❤ Your support means the world to me. Thank you for always being you and everything you do. I am so so glad to get to know you. I hope I can get to meet you in Italy or if you like you could come over here to Japan ❤ ❤ lots of love to you xxx -Saki

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Saki; love your blog. Your not “JUST” a Japanese girl. I don’t do Instagram or Facebook anymore, It’s all just a bit overwhelming, so i will just continue on this way. Whatever you decide to do be careful, and I will always enjoy hearing whatever you write about. Steve

    ________________________________

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Steve! Hehehe thank you so much. I think I am a modest person enough to call myself ‘just’ a Japanese girl. I find your compliment flattering though, I appreciate it. 🙂 I do agree social medias like them can be overwhelming for sure, I still sometimes have to balance them out even. i am glad though, to get to know you through my blog we wouldn’t find each other otherwise. I will post more in future. I hope to speak to you soon xxx -Saki

      Like

  4. Wonderful Blog…. Thank you for sharing a bit of your personal life. Depression is a bad demon. I know what you’re feeling because I’m going thru it. But God lets me wake up in the morning and reminds me that I’m alive and that I should be thankful. But I encourage you to continue your journey because it sounds like it’s going to be Amazing. Remember, there are stars in the evening…. So shine when you are in darkness. Sending you hugs from afar…. Mikey

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love you Mikey! ❤ ❤ I am so glad you got over it. I am so so proud of you ❤ thank you too also for sharing that with me. Your beautiful words here are so inspiring. Love that! I wish you all the best, and sending lots of love to your way ! xxx -Saki

      Like

  5. I always enjoy your blog. You are introspective and insightful. As a retired business executive that can no longer afford to travel the world your periscopes have helped fill that void. Thank you.

    Your decision to travel will impact you more than you can possibly imagine at this point. A confidence to solve problems will be built that will serve you well throughout the rest of your life. Life will become richer for you with less worries.

    I always enjoyed reaching out to locals in foreign countries whether as a travel guide, interpretor or security. Much joy is learned from them. Because one feels safer as you learn more in these three areas.

    Have fun and stay safe. Feel free to email me if you like.

    Best Regards,

    Jerry Hague

    Jerryhague@gmail.com

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Keep moving forward, Saki. Don’t look back. You’ll have plenty of time to look back when you’re an older woman. Like, let’s say when you’re actually 61.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I have enjoyed your Instagram posts and I’m a bit surprised you were depressed because you are sunny in your disposition now. Happy to hear you are able to put things in perspective now.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s